Wednesday, June 13, 2007


to wait on God can be more than we can handle...and when we finally hear from Him, it can also be, more than we can handle.

my little ella is only 3 months old, and has already, felt His hand on her life. after we were told she would maybe not see out of her right eye and could possibly be missing a part of her brain, i hit the limit. actually, i had some overage there. but, in the midst of it, i remembered feeling this peace weeks earlier regarding ella's eyes. God was going to heal them. before we knew that the problem was anything more than being a newborn, God let me know what he was going to do.

and to hear that nothing could be done - no surgery, medication, patch could heal her - well, it kind of felt like a challenge.

God, are you really who you say you are? are you still Jehovah Rophe? Do you still heal? If I ask you, will you let me down?

and so i took my fear and doubt and hope and trust and invited some friends to come lay hands on my sweet baby and take God up on his offer.

and He showed up.

our friends said they felt His presence there. some saw beautiful pictures that they shared. some said that it helped renew their own faith - it sure did ours.

and then we just had to wait.

i was sick to my stomach approaching the reception desk. i knew He could do it. i knew He promised to do it - but what if ella was the exception? what if we had to learn a lesson like that would take a while? (isn't it sad how we always think that God gave us something terrible to teach us a lesson? that is so dumb. He loves to give us good things, not painful things. )

but again, He showed up. and the optic nerve in her right eye, which a month ago was not developed, today looked almost the same as the normal nerve.

and what was medically impossible, became possible with the God who healed yesterday, today and tomorrow.

and i felt, for the first time in months, like i was in a summer rainstorm, barefoot, with my eyes closed and looking up towards the sky and warm rain hitting my face.

and i don't need an umbrella from this grace that is pouring down from the clouds like rain.